*Sigh*
Welcome to the latest round of The Bitchy One’s “You-Couldn’t-Make-This-Shit-Up..”
I was back in England visiting my best friend and I’d gone shopping.
While I was walking around in town I went into a sweet shop (candy store) to buy a curly wurly.
I decided I could indulge myself!
They had all kinds of retro sweets and I bought some shrimps, black jacks and fruit salads too so it was lovely!
Then it all started to go wrong.
Horribly, horribly wrong.
I saw packets of Space Dust.
Also known as Pop Rocks.
Remember that stuff?
You could put a few crystals on your tongue and it would pop and blast your teeth?!
I remember my brother pouring a whole packet into his mouth and screaming like he’d burst his bloody ear drums!!
WUSS!!
But I disgress (nothing new there now is there?!)
I had a brainwave.
It probably wouldn’t have shown up on a scan but humour me, it’s all good (sorta)
I thought of making some fairy cakes for my friends little boys with pop rocks in them so that they would pop when they ate them!
Fun huh?
Funny fuggin ha ha.
I wish I’d got some kind of warning when I’d added them to the batter.
If they’d fizzed a bit then I might have re thought the plan but no. That would be too easy wouldn’t it?
I put the batter into all the little bun cases and stuck it in the oven.
I was debating over icing them with sprinkles or not when all of a sudden, downtown Kabul entered the kitchen.
The noise was impressive, not just popping but floofing and flubbing and quite definite splooshing too.
The bloody stuff was exploding in the heat of the oven and taking cake mix prisoner!
I opened the oven door..
Yes you DID read that right.
I opened the bloody oven bloody door – and promptly ducked as molten cake mix missed me by a hair.
I shut the bloody oven damn quick too and turned it off!
I didn’t open it again until five minutes or so after the last flumph sounded and oh sweet mary moonshine – that oven looked like the exorcist was filmed in it.
I felt queasy looking at it and the smell of burning cake splat isn’t attractive.
I had to wait for it to cool down before I could try and get the worst off and then slather it with oven cleaner.
It was a BITCH to clean and was almost the end of my baking days I’m telling you!
Bloody kids can have sodding cosmo cupcakes next time and LIKE IT!! Pfffft!!
Copyright © 2018 The Britchy One, Bitchininthekitchen – All rights reserved
Reblogged this on Bitchin’ in the Kitchen and commented:
It’s TBT so I’m sharing one of my pre dawn posts with you all. Happy one-more-day-until-the-weekend!!
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I do hope you haven’t left baking though. The spirit is what actually counts. Right? Ignoring the fact that it might have taken you a lifetime to clean the oven😂
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I still love to bake – surprisingly!!
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That’s really cool 😀
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I totally needed this laugh today!!
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Happy to oblige!
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OMG hahahahahaha that is funny!! I bet you had fun cleaning the oven hahahahahah
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So funny. Thanks for sharing.
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Thank you 😊
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Wow thanks for sharing, this was a pretty funny cooking mishap. I have those issues pop up a lot when baking, that’s why I think cooking is so much easier.
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Bright ideas are great – until they’re NOT!!
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Your life contains a flurry of stories that make for great reading. Either more shit flies your way or you have an amazing ability to take the lemons we all get but you manage to turn them into very entertaining tv comedy. Without the tv.
Thanks for today’s laugh!
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I think it’s a bit of both – I definitely inherited the blather from both my parents!
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…and you make great lemonade!!
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Pffft… you could have gone with Margaritas 😂
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Rewind…Margaritas!!! And Lemon bars!
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Now we’re cooking!! Just no pop rocks!!
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Hahaha Whoo! Note to self! Glad you tried that first!
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Loved this! I am nominating you for the Sunshine Blogger award! My post will be up soon.
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Thank you so much! I always feel so privileged when I’m nominated 😊
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OMG that is some funny shit right there!!
Ugh sorry about the oven, usually when I make a mess like that I just pitch everything in the trash, you can throw cake pans and stuff away but a bit hard to chuck your bloody oven out!!
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Yup! It was less than six months old too! I learned a lot about ovens that day and which ones are a bitch to clean!
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They didn’t explode in the bowl? That IS surprising. Downtown Kabul… you had me laughing. But poor you. Should have had the kids clean the oven.
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They didn’t pop on top of pudding either.. I guess it’s not wet enough. I think it was the best of the oven that exploded it..
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LOL. That’s worse than my family’s cooking fails.
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Still laughing…hahahaha!
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You know- I bet there’s STILL traces of cupcake in that kitchen if it was CSI’d!
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