Spring Cleaning With A Book Tag

I’ve been tagged by old buggerlugs himself, that Guy Called Bloke to take part in a book tag! I’m a very prolific reader.. in fact this has probably kept me out of jail as I can’t read and shenaniganate at the same time. Books are one of the few expenses ‘im indoors is delighted by. If I’m reading I’m behaving!

If I buy shoes.. well shoes are trouble. Shoes mean I’m adventuring and that seldom ends well. He doesn’t actually mind me buying shoes either – he hadn’t worked out my concept of buy one (shoe) get one (shoe) free yet! When I come home with four shoes for the price of two he thinks I’m an excellent bargain hunter! This is actually true of course – I didn’t search for matching handbags..

But back to the books! I love books. I’m still sorry I decided against bringing my books when I left England (what was I thinking?!) I easily had a good 1500 books and shipping was prohibitively expensive. I miss my old friends though.

So this tag has Rules:

• Please link back to Daniel @ Page To Page

• Respond to the scenarios

• Tag 5 people (or however many you like)

Here is the tag for Daniel to make it easier if you copy and paste the rules: https://ptopreviews.wordpress.com/2018/06/06/spring-cleaning-book-tag-original/

The Scenarios

It’s time to make your bed, but you’re going to have some friends over later and want to pick the perfect book to place on your nightstand for them all to see that you’re “reading”. Which book do you choose?

I don’t buy books I don’t want to read but if I wanted to send a message with the title I’d pick this – it keeps ‘im indoors on his toes!

Oh no! The house needs dusting, but you just can’t put that book you’re reading down! What book would you buy on audio just so you could continue the story while cleaning?

I’m not a fan of audio books whilst working as I can’t concentrate. I usually listen to music but I think if I’m playing along I’d pick this. I have the whole set.

Darn it! The ceiling is leaking! Turns out Mass-Market Paperbacks are the best things to soak water up!Which popular book do you use to soak up the water?

Without a doubt, this book. The Magic Lamp. One of my former employers was a bald headed knobsock (and that’s being nice) and he insisted we all had to buy this book and read it and – write a review! We had to submit a copy of the review to him along with a photo of us with the book. I wrote a review that I absolutely plagiarised from reviews on Amazon and took a picture of me standing on the book. I bet the snivelling germaphobe never even read it.

Bathrooms need a good scrubbing, and your 2007 Cosmos are a little outdated and need replacing. What book do you place in the bathroom for some light reading for when people need to take care of business?

I’m the worlds worst for reading in the loo. I’m the reason my dad took the lock off the bathroom door growing up! We went through a large scale addition to the house and for a couple of weeks, only had one bathroom.

Unfortunately this was right over Christmas when builders in the UK traditionally take a two week break. I used to go to boarding school and HATED it so, in the manner of Blackadder, I hatched a cunning plan. I got all my Christmas books together and strategically decamped to the little bookworms room. Soon enough, there was a queue of turgid bladders needing to avail themselves of my retreat. I wasn’t coming out until I had extracted a promise that I didn’t have to go back to school – Machiavelli had nothing on me!

Family is coming over, but you have no idea what to make for dinner! You read somewhere that tearing up the last chapter of a book whose ending you hated and sprinkling it in a casserole dish makes for the perfect meal! Which book do you choose?

A book I hate? Yeah that’d be the Magic Lamp again! I think I’d feed them a book on manners. That being said, one of my favourite things to leave out when inviting people to dinner is this

Opened to this recipe.

One of these days I’m going to ask for the ingredients at the butchers counter in Wegmans. It has to be done *evil cackle*

Organization is key, right? When it comes time to organize your bookshelf, you realize you have enough room (and money) to get three new books! Which books do you buy?

Oh that’s easy! I’ll just go to my ‘saved for later basket on Amazon! Only three is tough though.

Finally, some peace and quiet! But, before you can relax, you realize you forgot to send your Aunt a thank you gift for the lovely “ADULT LIFE FOR DUMMIES” book she gave you for Christmas (maybe she’s trying to tell you something?). What book do you send to her to show her how much (this is sarcasm) you appreciate her gift?

This would be diverted to my shitster in law as I actually like my aunts!

Tag- You’re it!!

Lana at Coles Camp Fire

Anacskies Bookish Musings

The Book Stooge

Cafe Book Bean

Chomeuse With A Chou

John at Crap Pile

The Bookkeeper

The Ceaseless Reader Writes