Something to think about – make today YOURS!!
Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?
Statistic of the day:
More Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died of Ebola. The statistic does not state which is considered a worse fate.
If you came with Instructions, what would they say? Mine would be ‘Don’t Leave Unattended’ or ‘Not Compatible with Husband X Edition’
Babies are only cute so we get in the habit of not killing them before they turn into toddlers
Make one act of kindness every day for a year and change 365 lives.
There is Eternal life – try stopping junk mail or even mail from political parties for dead people.
If there were Sexlympics (no not lympdics, this isn’t pfizer-thon) – men who came second would be the better men..
Todays Advice:
D9n’t 4ry to’ wr14e Bl0g p@sts wh1.le cle’a]ni.ng yu’r ke]yb29oa;rd
Holy crap, the magnet one was the best!!!! I’ve never heard that before, thanks Britchy. I cannot wait to use that one in front of my wife, she’ll be impressed!!!
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Let me know where to send flowers!!
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Daffodils work
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LOL
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Cheers Britchy, I just used it for the first time!!!!
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…and you lived?!
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Well, I didn’t say it to someone, I just told my wife and buddies about it!!!
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Phew! I thought I’d lost a blogging friend! 😂
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It’ll take a lot more than that. You’ll probably have to block me first!!!
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Nope! Enjoy your blog waaay too much for that
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Awe Shucks!
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This is hilarious!! Loved all of them!! Thanks for the laugh!
Instructions: If I did not respond I probably did not hear you! 😁
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Yeah I have used ‘I heard you but I choose to ignore you’ far too much!
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Very sage sayings!! Especially the last one haha
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The last one is my defence in a sentence!!
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Any female judge would let you go free! For me, it’s not so much the talking back that I’m worried about today when I go to work in an hour and a half, but it’s the safety for the child who says they want to go shopping and I tell them to be ready AT 11am (or whatever time) and remind them over and over that AT 11am I am leaving to take them because I have other things I have to do for work. Then AT 11am, she decides that she is going to take a shower, then get dressed, then brush her teeth. Is there a cute picture for that one?
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That there’s a kid who’s not going shopping!!
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HAHA I think I actually left her once because she wasn’t ready and she threw a FIT! Crying and slamming doors and not talking to me for a few days. So I just calmly said through a closed door “I gave you over an hour to get ready. You knew I was leaving at this time and I told you way in advance I would leave without you. It was your choice to *fill in reason she didn’t get ready on time*. I’m sorry you didn’t get to go, maybe next time you’ll be ready on time.” It’s not often I get to do that, but Saturdays I work in the mornings until 3, and I hate staying late! I have other things to do Saturday afternoons and I can hardly ever make plans because I never know if I’m leaving on time or not. They need to respect time better haha
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I agree! It’s a hard lesson but if she doesn’t learn it’s on her not you!
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Yeah! And she’s really sensitive to being late for things. It’s just the “oh it’s saturday and it’s just shopping” mentality that needs work for her. The kids have gotten really good at knowing if I say I’m leaving in 5 minutes, it means 5 minutes. If it’s their mom it usually means 20 haha
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Damn. Now you’ve got me wondering about vanilla…
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It’s a conundrum alright
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Thank you for a morning laugh! These are fantastic!
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I’m glad you enjoyed it 😊
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LOVE! The chainsaw one and the Nike kitty one! We all laughed in our RV this morning… thank you!😁 btw… I have all the ingredients for my bloody chicken pot pie for Sunday evening, even cooked the chicken already…. I just have to decide on how to decorate the crust! 😇🤔😼
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Ooh I can’t wait to see how you decorate it! I loved the Nike kitty too, that made me burst out laughing!
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Thanks for my am chuckle😁
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You’re welcome! It’s raining rhinos here, the temperature is dropping and it’s beyond bleak – we need a giggle!
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All fantastic stuff.
I’ve nomintated you for something. Feel free not to bother with it, if you don’t want to.
I’ve decided life’s too short to go back and correct spelling mistakes. 🙂
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Hurray for illegitimacy 😂
Sorry. I couldn’t help it!!
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🙂
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Hahahaaa these are brilliant! My cat already subscribes to the biting-for-no-reason mantra, I’m thinking he wouldn’t like it if the shoe was on the other paw though so maybe I’ll put that one to the test! Thanks for the giggles.
Have a lovely weekend =]
Caz xx
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It’s pouring here and cold and YUK!!! I hope your day is better!
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Teaching the neighborhood kids to curse…heh. If I had kids, I wouldn’t have to teach them…my kids would. I have been associated with, and part of, the Dept. Of The Navy since I was 15. It is important to curse as an “educated sailor”. Enunciate clearly. 🤬
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Abso-bloody-lutely!!
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Excuse me while I go bite someone. Anyone.
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Attagir… thing. Attathing
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ROFL
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This was just what I needed today! Did make me giggle. Thank you 🙂
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I’m glad it brightened your day, it’s been grisly here, raining cold and windy all day – UGH!
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As usual, you had me 😂😂
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I’m glad 😊
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😊
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“Not suitable for children under 3”… lot of loose parts
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Oooh good one 😂
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From the one being attacked by bees while trying to find some unobtrusive place to hide the chainsaw, thanks Britchy (the one who shouldn’t be left unsupervised) for the great chuckle!
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Totally brilliant 🙂
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Thank you 😊
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Hey Britchy, l have tagged you for the Hocus Pocus questions 🙂
I know that you are on a nominee sabbatical like me, but thought you might like the questions anyway .
https://aguycalledbloke.blog/2018/10/29/hocus-pocus-questions/
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Good gawd. On what planet did your brain get manufactured?
The place with dancing bees and mischief kitties.
What a riot. I needed that.
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Don’t ask, don’t tell 😎
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Are you ok? 🙂
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Struggling a bit with wafty
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… vision and headaches!!
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Sorry to hear that, hopefully things will improve – sounds lame, but it is well meant, but more importantly who is this Wafty?
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I don’t know but when I find out I’m ending him!
I strongly suspect his first name is ‘Dave’…
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Ha ha ha ha ha!
You posed the question: “Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?” I have the answer. Because in ice cream, the color of the tiny black vanilla beans doesn’t have a chance to leach into the much thicker (and white) cream, whereas the color quickly and thoroughly leaches into and dyes the alcohol into which the beans are dissolved. Now don’t you feel better knowing?
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Yes! Yes I do!! 😊
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Thanks for the chuckles. Going to sleep now with a smile on my face.
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