Christmas has come and gone and we’re already half way through January but I’m not done with it! Oooh no! I haven’t had a chance yet to tell you about it. I had a lot of fun playing tricks on people but there was one where I got EVERYONE! It was glorious. I tried to set my phone to tape it but it didn’t work. I don’t know why, I can’t wait to get shot of this bloody Crapple WHY phone. It always lets me down.
I thought of this plan ten days before I executed it and I deserve recognition for that because you all know my impulse control is zilch. Nada. Non Existent!
My four month old grandson was here and as you know, babies don’t do much but eat and poop. He did go home having learned to blow raspberries and scream like a banshee for fun so I’m quite proud of my educational abilities too. I don’t think I’ll be asked to babysit again anytime soon either. They went out with friends one night so I had a lovely time texting pictures of Thumper playing with fireworks*, holding cans of beer and wine bottles, climbing the Christmas tree, holding bags of chips and chocolate bars.. apparently I’m irresponsible. I’m surprised anyone thought that was news!
Anyway, back to the prank. I decided I had to do a ‘gross everyone out’ prank again.
I got a clean, unused diaper of Thumpers and scrunched it up a few times so it didn’t look new. I poured a half pint of water into it too so it looked nice and full then I made up a packet of butterscotch and a packet of chocolate pudding and swirled a few stripes of the darker pudding through the lighter one. I used cook and serve pudding because the texture is better. For Brits, think blancmange instead of angel delight.
Then I dolloped a dessertspoons worth into the diaper and left it on the kitchen counter. You have to think ahead of you want it to be believable. Too much ‘poop’ and no ‘wee’ would have given the game away immediately. I heard Princess PITA coming in the back door with her hubby and ‘im indoors so I called Thmellyarthe and Fartichoke and everyone landed in the kitchen pretty much simultaneously. It took a minute for ‘im indoors to notice the diaper and with great disgust, he declared ‘Jesus H Christ, who left that on the counter?” Fartichoke looked and immediately started gagging whilst Thmellyarthe looked green. Princess PITA righteously pronounced I always put them in the bin and Hubzilla just looked stupid. It’s his best side. I turned around ‘to see what the fuss was about’ as you do. I looked, stuck my finger in, licked it and said “Definitely sweet potato”
Fartichoke made a dash for one bathroom, heaving all the way and Thmellyarthe sprinted to the other. Synchronized puking isn’t a skill in many households, it’s commonplace in ours.
The other three didn’t get sick but they were all heaving and disgusted. It was win win because no one wanted any of the other pudding either so I got the lot!
*it was a toy kaleidoscope that I taped a wick too – don’t panic!
The photo is Thumper asleep on me.
Bahahahaha!
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You’re evil! 🙂
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This is very true!!
I don’t know if you’ve had time to listen to any of Bottomless Coffees podcasts but I would dearly love to hear you on one – PLEASE!!
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I would love to hear what you have to say Ruby, gosh I could only image the interesting conversation we would have.
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She’s going to be fabulous! I’m on the edge of my seat with fingers crossed for this one
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LOL OMG!! Can you be the grandmother to my non existent children? I’ve been looking at baby names all day on Pinterest. Apparently the site is trying to tell me something…
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I’d be delighted to! That would be so much fun! The YankBrit grandma to Canucks. I’m messing them up before they start!!
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Amazing!! I can’t wait haha but I’m going to pick a super unique name so be prepared
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As long as it’s not Osiris for a boy it’s cool!
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I don’t even know how to pronounce that! One I saw today for a boy that I INSTANTLY fell in love with was Waverly – like OMG🥰
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I like that! I think I’d like it more for a girl though because it’s so pretty.
I think I need more cats to name. I might even try not to call them Farty Stinkbutt and Sir Schitzalott this time..
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Oooo for a GIRL!!! I love boy names that work for girls like James or Wyatt (celebrity baby names).
Hehe! Ooo cats! You could always get fish to name? I name all my brother’s fish. But they are all named Pancakes and one random one is Waffles. But they are all identical so I just stand in front of the tank going “hi pancakes! And pancakes! And pancakes! And….you are waffles!”
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I had a lovely fish tank years ago until the kids fed them chocolate biscuits and knackered the filter!
I had James Pond, Goldfinger and Jaws, Jacques Cousteau and Eel- Laine And a host of others!
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I love those names!!! So creative, you are!
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OMG!!!! This is the best thing ever. I might try it next time I babysit. I’ll let you know how it turns out. Can’t stop laughing.
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It was hilarious! Well – I thought it was hilarious anyway! I was giggling like a maniac trying to type it out!
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I just sympathy gagged with your poor kids! And I knew what was coming. You are evil…
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I really am. I shouldn’t be so proud of it but we all have our skills
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Hilarious 😂
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Thank you 😊
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Britchey being Britchey!!! LOL
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At least I’m consistent!
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Very True, Im glad you’re an Allie and not and adversary!!!
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Haha!! You are terrible but you always make me laugh!!😂😂💕
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It’s not my fault! The bad things think of themselves and take me along as a hostage 😇
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Angels and you don’t go together 🙂
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Fallen angels do!!
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LOL
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Ingenious and naughty. Brilliant idea. 🙃🤣
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The debbils in the details!!
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😛
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hahahaha!!! That was so clever! What was their reaction when they discovered it was a prank?
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My sons both laughed and found it funny! My daughter said I was stupid lol
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ha ha!
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What did your husband say when he found out it was a prank?
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He rolled his eyes and said ‘again? You’d think I’d learn!’
I got him with a similar prank with leftover chocolate frosting shaped like cat poop a few weeks ago!
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Oh, gross!
I’m surprised he fell for it, considering you (not an insult). Ah well, domestic bliss 🙂
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You’d be amazed how gullible my family still are! I wouldn’t trust me with both hands tied behind my backs!
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Neither would I (no offence).
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I loved that one. And, like, the next day was National Chocolate Frosting Day!
I love your twisted brain. No one could ever claim you were dull.
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Too funny…
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Yassssssssssss!! 😂😂
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I mean this most fondly and respectfully: YOU ARE A NUTCASE!!!!!!
I am so glad! You always brighten up my day!
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Nutcase is one of the nicer things I’ve been called LOL
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Definitely sweet potato. I love sweet potato. But the imagery is😏🤣🤣🤣
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I love sweet potatoes too!!
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This is so disgusting….I love it. I know I can always come here for a good laugh every now and then, thank you.
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You’re very welcome 😊
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Four months old doing raspberries! That’s quiet an accomplishment! Well done grandma
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I have the BEST video of it! I laugh my head off watching it 😊
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The best part of being a parent is grossing out or mortifying our kids…you did both in one go – well done!
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I have a lifetimes experience doing just that! 😂
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We can definitely be friends. 😉
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Hurray!! I always need more accomplices!!
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I’d consider it an honor!
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Drucking excellent!!! Atypically Britchy at her very best!!
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Omg… that’s diabolical.
Bravo!
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OMG I wish I could have seen this. I would have been dying laughing. I love your stories and now I understand why John called you nana. 🙂
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I’m the nightmare grandma lol
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Never! I wish my grandma had had your sense of humor. You are awesome
😘
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Hahahaha!! I might have to try that some day. Too funny!!
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Well I had fun anyway!!
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Remind me never to invite you for dinner.. Oh my goodness!!! BWAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!
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The photo is precious.
“Hubzilla just looked stupid. It’s his best side.” Best line.
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Oh my word! I’m dying haha! 😆
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I have zero impulse control. I think it counts as a disability!
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I still haven’t totally recovered from the spittoon joke.
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Forty years on from my mother telling me – neither have I!!
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😆
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HILARIOUS! You’re cruel!
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Yes. Yes I am!!! Lol
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🙂
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