Agatha Christie had all the best titles, I really was addicted to them growing up (explains a lot…) I still am to be honest!
For various reasons I’ve spent today mentally planning my ex’s funeral.
He’s not dead and to the best of my knowledge (sadly) he’s not going to shuffle off this mortal coil anytime soon – but dreaming is free!
Its like planning spending a lottery win, there is something just so pleasing about trying to decide between a discreet Chanel style little black dress or a Schiaparelli pink number with fuck me shoes!
Champagne. It’ll be Krug of course. Nothing but the best for joyous occasions. No Bolly to send off the wally, but then again, maybe Korbel to toast him in hell?
Tough decisions as you can see.
In comparison, food is easy and cheap. As was he in life. If I wanted to memorialise him in food, well, it’d have to be shit.
I believe that we should celebrate his future not his past though so it’ll be devilled eggs, devils food cake, lobster fra diavolo, devils on horseback … you get the idea!!
Of course we need music to send him off with too and honestly, this was where I had the most fun.
Songs For A Dead Dave
The Living Years – Mike & The Mechanics
Bury My Body – The Animals
Another One Bites The Dust – Queen
Die Another Day – Madonna
End Of the Road – Boys To Men
Hospital Food – David Gray
If Tomorrow Never Comes – Ronan Keating
Crash and Burn – Savage Garden
Smoke Gets in Your Eyes – The Platters
Wake me up before you go go – Wham
Died In Your Arms Tonight – Cutting Crew
Praying for Time – George Michael
Prayer for The Dying – Seal
Dead End Street – The Kinks
Dead On Arrival – Fall Out Boy
Just Like A Pill- Pink
The Drugs Don’t Work – The Verve
Stairway to Heaven – Led Zeppelin
Speed Me Towards Death – Rob Dougan
Living in a Box – Living in a Box
Jump- Van Halen
View From A Bridge – Kim Wilde
Spirit In The Sky – Doctor and The Medics
Accidents Will Happen – Elvis Costello
Road to Hell – Chris Rea
Celebrate – Kool and the Gang
Going Underground – the Jam
Burning Ring of Fire – Johnny Cash
Cold as Ice – Foreigner
Bat Out of Hell – Meatloaf
Let the Bodies Hit The Floor – Drowning Pool
Ashes to Ashes – David Bowie
Push The Little Daisies – We’en
Die With Your Boots On – Iron Maiden