Snow in November is caused by people decorating for Christmas too early. This is known as Premature Precipitation. You’ll know if you’ve been Prematurely Precipitated if you are suddenly covered in white stuff. With Premature Precipitation you can never know how long it will last or how many inches you’ll get. There is a very … Continue reading November, Month Of The Damned..
The Confession first . I’ve started to hate blogging. ‘I must write a blog post’ has landed right up there with ‘I must unclog the toilet, balance the checkbook and bath the cat’ (none of which I ever do but you get the picture - I don’t want to do them so I don’t!) Yes … Continue reading A Confession, A Resolution And NO Eff Words … But There’s Shit. Definitely Shit!!
Well about time too! If you ever want to sell a home in the Poughkeepsie NY area - I can tell you who NOT to use! I've been seriously underwhelmed with our realtor. We had actually discussed taking the house off the market over winter and delisting in the Spring - with a different realtor. … Continue reading Bitchin’ In The … WAIT! I Sold The Kitchen!!
"I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all." Four years ago today I recited the pledge and became a US Citizen. Something I have been amazed and humbled by every day since. … Continue reading Celebrating today..
Today has been, ghastly. Last week I took my Chunkeroo to the vet because he wasn’t eating and he had a lump on his jaw. ‘im indoors thought it was an abscess as fatty Chunkahula had had teeth out previously. The vet thought my Chunkzilla had a blocked salivary gland so the plan was to … Continue reading Goodbye Chunks.
One of the things in life that brings me most joy is my pets. One of the things in life that brings me most sorrow... is pets. Chunks, Chunkmeister, Chunkzilla, Chunkahula.. the cat of a thousand names and a breakfast for each of them. ChunkyMonkey isn't doing so well. I took him to the vet … Continue reading Back At The Heartbreak Hotel.
In the Bible, Satan aka the serpent, tempted Eve into sin with an apple. It’s. I’ve to know some things never change huh?! Apples led me astray today as well. It wasn’t a very long walk admittedly. Truth be told, I have frequent flyer miles in sinning.. Moving swiftly on! I was in Wegmans and … Continue reading Apples and …Ketchup?!
If the title wasn’t enough, this contains huge spoilers so be warned! While I was in Georgia with my daughter I FINALLY watched Mamma Mia 2. That came out while she was pregnant and we didn’t have the opportunity to go together. We had both enjoyed the first Mamma Mia so much together we couldn’t … Continue reading Mamma Mia 2. The Obituary.
In the end, all that really matters is love. In what could be our last moments, no one thinks of who to smite. All anyone thinks of is the need to tell people they love them. If you could have one minute over, you'd make sure no one doubted how much they meant to you. … Continue reading A Lesson From 9/11
So I haven’t been all sweetness and light this summer. Hard to believe I know but there it is. I found time for a little naughtiness along the way! I went down to Georgia for my grandsons first birthday. I know! It’s only five minutes since he was born! How the heck did that happen?! … Continue reading Cracklin’ Crap and Infested Drawers..
Don’t be afraid to leave a job. There comes a time when they can’t see past what they think you are or can do. Sometimes you have to shine your light in a different corner Don’t be afraid to dance. It doesn’t matter who is watching, it only matters that you feel alive. Don’t be … Continue reading Don’t
Aren’t men funny? In every sense of the word. Funny ha-ha, funny peculiar and funny-why-are-you-still-alive? ‘im indoors is a prime example. There’s the easy way, the hard way and his way. I have the patience of a saint I’m telling ya! Cars. I want to buy a new/newer car when we move. I’ve kind of … Continue reading Geezerly McFuddy-Duddy And The Oldest Swinger In Town.
Taughannock Falls, NY 2019 Gosh it's been a crazy couple of months. I haven't had time to read never mind think. Something had to give as I was extremely overloaded. Princess PITA's spinal surgery and her subsequent terrifying pulmonary embolism. Trying to get a house ready to sell and finally getting it on the market … Continue reading Did you miss me?!
I’m back from Georgia and whilst I don’t like Georgia very much, I’m not happy to be back in NY either. My BS tolerance meter is at an all time low and frankly, NY really IS the bullshit state. Are you reading for one of my rants?! Tough! You’re going to get one! We’re going … Continue reading Prostitution!! But who’s paying??
My daughter had to have emergency back surgery so I'm down in Georgia looking after her and Thumper. I didn't bring my laptop and time is very tight but I'll be back to normal next week!
As you probably know if you’ve read a few of my posts, I’m a voracious reader. I read 3-4 books a week easily, more if I’m having any downtime. While I was very sick I was averaging 10 a week. I’d sooner read than watch TV. Reading isn’t a hobby for me, it’s necessity. I … Continue reading Book Review: Ayesha At Last – Uzma Jalaluddin
I had an interesting conversation this week. About God. Not something I talk about a lot. Religion - or belief, is one of ‘those subjects’. You know. The ones thar get people well and truly aerated. This conversation was along the lines of ‘if there’s a God, why does bad stuff happen’. I had a … Continue reading Almighty Parenting!
Well in spite of being extraordinarily busy at work and working extra hours every day this week.. I still found time to ponder a load of crap. Obviously this means YOU now have to ponder it too! These are the things I think of when I’m hiding out in the bathroom because I’m over peopled!! … Continue reading Things I Just Don’t Get..
I’m so flippin’ cross. I’ve just made something that’s made my blood boil. I hate cruelty and I despise bullies. People who are homeless probably think they’ve hit rock bottom but they’re wrong. There’s a gutter far beneath where the human filth who prey on the homeless reside. These are usually people who are far … Continue reading Scumbag of the Year? Probably.
We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal. ......And that my friends is right where it stops. Since when do we all deserve the same? If you sit on your fat ass all day why do you deserve the same as someone who slogs their guts out? There are … Continue reading The Britchy Bill Of Rights
I must admit that at my age...I started to think about this. It was very reassuring to take this quick test and know this ...I'm good! If you are over 40 yrs old, you absolutely SHOULD take this Alzheimer's Test Scroll on.. How fast can you guess these words and fill-in the blanks? 1. _ … Continue reading Self Examination Alzheimer’s Test….
This whole 'Having A Job Malarkey' is really getting in the way of me living my best life. I need cheering up. That means you have to suffer along while I amuse myself! Smile Peasants!!! A woman walks into a library and asked if they had any books about paranoia. The librarian says "They're right … Continue reading Hump Day Fun
So this was an educational weekend. We got a lot of gardening done but the kitchen progress stalled because Home Depot cut the kitchen counter tops incorrectly. I did suggest ‘im indoors measured them before accepting them but What Do I Know. I Am A Mere Woman And Shouldn’t Trouble My Pretty Little Head With … Continue reading What A Palaver!
Memorial Day We drove past Vassar today which was a mistake. It’s Commencement today. You know what that means? Chaos!! Lots of entitled twits in cars trying to back into traffic without looking because the nasty campus security wouldn’t let them drive into the handicapped parking area without a tag. There was an astronomical amount … Continue reading On Memorial Day
I’m down in Poughkeepsie and we’re working on the garden so we can sell this house and move on to the next step of our lives. It’s a lovely house, it’s in a fantastic neighbourhood surrounded by trees and were being serenaded by a thousand birds. Scarlet Cardinals are swooping past hoping to snag a … Continue reading How Does Your Garden Grow?
So I've had three big days in a row and time has escaped me. Monday I had a training day at work (almost total twatwaffle but hey, it was a day out of the office!) It was kind of interesting though so there's a post coming out of that. Tuesday I had my Notary Public … Continue reading Just a quickie..
A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday. 'I'd like to be six again', she replied, still looking in the mirror . On the morning … Continue reading Life Is A Roller Coaster..
Weird things I’ve rehomed ... or misappropriated if you believe in the police report fairy.. In my defence, it was justifiable retribution! Details will follow after I double check the statute of limitations and the fifth amendment. •The HT leads off a Ford tractor (Ireland) •Several car aerials (all from bastards) •Garden gnomes (postcards were … Continue reading Well – How Did THAT Happen?!
I was looking up cocktail recipes and boy some of them are complicated!! My all time favourite, a Rum Runner has more ingredients than I've got brain cells... fact! No wonder they're so expensive (but yummy!) I started thinking about creating cocktails myself and you'll be unsurprised to know I have come up with one. … Continue reading Name Your Poison!!
Never kiss frogs. They might turn into a handsome prince and who’s got time for that shit? Being married to a "Dave" means leaving this world the way you came into it.. Screaming and covered in someone else's blood... Dear Sneeze, if you're gonna happen, Happen! Don't put a stupid look on my face and … Continue reading Saturday Thoughts…
Sooooo I went to Walmart yesterday. I thought it would be nice to buy some stationery (school supplies) for my nieces because they love that stuff. I can get them things here none of their friends have. It’s fun. I am not equipped for thinking OR Walmart. In spite of previous disgrace and mortification I … Continue reading Don’t Make Me Go To Walmart!!
We all try our best at parenting. Some times we get it right. Sometimes we don’t. Sometimes we feel like we got it right but later, way down the line we’ll, we realise.. maybe not. This is one such incident. I have a funny story from when my daughter was little. She was 5 or … Continue reading … That Time I Failed As A Parent..
After my Mother’s Day post I just wanted to finish my thoughts. My mum was a complicated woman. She lived a very black and white life when truthfully, life is just many shades of grey. She made life hard for herself and others but ultimately I think she hurt herself most of all. I have … Continue reading Give A Little, Get A Lot
Swearing or NOT Swearing - A Load Of Old Shit? I over heard a child swearing in Wegmans today. I really should thank Wegmans sometime. There's a large portion of my posts that exist solely because of interactions therein! Anyway. The little boy must've been about two. He was sitting in the cart while his … Continue reading Well, Son of A Beech…
....you know it's going to be one of those days when your daughter texts you a picture of a fella and you text back: How much did you drink? 1. He's too old for you 2. He's repulsive. 3. Check the sex offender registry because that right there is a pervert. ....and she replies "That's … Continue reading The Frog Prince?
Today is Mother's Day in the US. I'm sat by myself. One kid is in Georgia. One is in North Carolina and one is in bed. 'im indoors is across state prepping our other house for sale and I'm on the sofa with two fat cats, a farting beagle and a 10lb chupacapra who is … Continue reading Thinking Out Loud On Mother’s Day
Hello everyone The past few weeks have been a rollercoaster. I've dealt with crippling migraines, ongoing eyeball sagas, pneumonia and pleurisy, selling a house or rather, preparing to sell it, theft, disloyalty/betrayal, grief - I needed to retreat. I will be talking more about those but I needed time and distance from events first. I … Continue reading The Wanderer Returns
I was thinking about the things I’d change if I was President for the day. Here are some of them. 365 day Presidents’ Day sales in shoe stores. Junk emails and scams punishable by castration or beheading. In many cases it’s the same thing. Same goes for unsolicited telesales calls and people selling our data. … Continue reading When I’m President For The Day..
Well after the MRI’s and MRA’s.. I saw the ocular testicle* neurologist again on Wednesday . Turns out I do have an aneurysm my brainium. It’s only a little one though so we’re just going to ignore it like it isn’t there and check on it once a year unless it causes problems ( I’m … Continue reading Further Adventures With My Ocular Testicles
Hi everyone, Sorry for the hiatus, it was much needed. I had a plate full of stress with health worries, migraines out the wazoo and not being allowed migraine meds. Worries about MRIs etc and family issues and then the straw that broke the camels back - the resurgence of Doolally Doris, the ugliest cyber … Continue reading Sneakin’ in the back Door..
I just heard from the eyeball neuro. No brain tumour but she needs to look at the aneurysm thing in greater detail. My thinking is if it doesn’t have a flashing neon sign saying ‘aneurysm this way’ - I ain’t concerned!! It showed up that I have a very deep seated sinus infection which she’s … Continue reading Update On My Low Hanging Balls..
I'm constantly thinking up little gems as 'im indoors calls them. When I remember I make a note and when I have enough I inflict them on you. You're welcome. I thought I'd found a lump in each of my breasts. Turns out it was just my knees. There is a reason it's called 'girls … Continue reading More Of My Shittery..
Thank you for putting up with me! Thank you for reading my crap. Thank you for your comments, you've made it a great year and I've truly appreciated just how horribly bored you must be!
Yesterday I had my MRI’s and MRA’s. I'm pretty sure I SHOULD now have super powers after being cooked so long hence my new super hero name. I didn’t sleep very well the night before. I kept having flashbacks to the previous one and it wasn’t a fun few hours. Fate was smiling on me … Continue reading The Advent Of Galaxy Bitch.. Or MRI day..
Hands up who immediately started singing “getting to know all about you” in their head?! Yup, you’re my tribe! Laura Venturini has created the “Getting to know you” challenge. It's very easy. 1. Copy and paste these rules and the questions listed below and tag at least two people to take the challenge. 2. Use … Continue reading Getting To Know You..
Blondie knew what she was talking about! Nothing is as irritating when you're trying to read than incessant phone calls. Particularly when they're asshat sales calls of fuckwittage. This doesn't bring out my best side. I have reading rabies. Don't believe me? Interrupt me mid chapter and diagnose it for yourself! A day in the … Continue reading Don’t Leave Me Hangin’ On The Telephone…
After much fuckwittery, I’m having the MRI/MRA of my brainium on the 31st. They’re knocking me out because it’s going to be a long one. I saw the ophthalmic neuro in Rochester on Dec 5th and she said it would probably be after Christmas because of booking an anaesthesiologist as well as the mri thingummyjob. … Continue reading The Saga Of Behind The Eyeball or How To Deal With Incompetent Lazy Fuckwits.
There’s nothing more alive than news about death. All I’m seeing everywhere are articles and posts about the Reproductive Health Bill. There are many things I dislike about NY. This is in a league of its own. Abortion is the major cause of death in the US. There are more abortions annually than deaths from … Continue reading NY. Where Nothing Is Cheaper Than Life.
I’m reblogging this so that if you have questions, you don’t forget to ask them!
That was a lot of fun and I thought it would be nice to do it again so, leave a comment with any questions you would like to ask me! You can ask as many or as few questions as you want
I’ll leave this open until Sunday morning and then I’ll post answers on Monday… Fire away!
Hey everyone, I want to draw your attention to some of the podcasts by my fellow blogger, Bottomless Coffee He’s interviewed a great many of the bloggers I follow and I’ve loved listening to them. Sometimes people can miss the inflections present in speech when they read instead of hear. Intent can be misinterpreted and … Continue reading It’s Good To Talk!!
Christmas has come and gone and we’re already half way through January but I’m not done with it! Oooh no! I haven’t had a chance yet to tell you about it. I had a lot of fun playing tricks on people but there was one where I got EVERYONE! It was glorious. I tried to … Continue reading Howdy Doody Dinner..
A couple of months ago I followed Bottomless Coffee’s lead and invited questions from all of you. You can read that here. That was a lot of fun and I thought it would be nice to do it again so, leave a comment with any questions you would like to ask me! You can ask … Continue reading Ask me anything!
If you've ever wonder what a high pitched Britchy sounds like - here's your chance to find out! I had a lovely chat with fellow blogger, Bottomless Coffee 007 and here's the podcast A Britchin’ Podcast This was fun, I'd love to see more of you take part so I can listen 😊
My lovely friend Kristian at Tales From The Mind Of Kristian Kristian has challenged me to follow his lead! The Eclectic Contrarian started with a photo with which he then challenged three people to write about. If you click on Kristian’s name above, you can read his story. I loved it. He added the picture … Continue reading Tell The Story – Dysfunctional Nursery Rhymes
Dear Whack Job Scientists, If ever you feel like taking a break from some of your more ludicrous experiments like The Propulsion Parameters Of Penguin Poop, Fruit Bat Fellatio or The Impact Of Wet Underwear On Thermal Comfort In The Cold, I have a challenge for you that will make women fawn all over you. … Continue reading Weight Loss, World Peace And Getting Whack Job Scientists Laid
It’s back to being just the two of us for a while which is nice. Well, the two of us and Daisy the devil dog. Oh and Milo the farting beagle, Chunks the Destroyer Of Cat Food And Hell Boy, the scaredy cat. But if you don’t count all of them - it’s just the … Continue reading Domestic… Bliss?!
We need some silliness I think! Here’s a little seasonal kitchen tip for those, like me, facing snowstorms: Put boiling water in the freezer. Then whenever you need boiling water, all you have to do is defrost it! I’m ever so helpful ain’t I?! It isn't a voodoo doll it's a pin cushion and any … Continue reading Weekend Funnies
Here I am, like a bad penny! It’s been a hectic couple of weeks of non stop cooking, cleaning up and stopping fights. I’m pretty sure my daughter, Princess PITA could fall out with herself if left in a room alone. I’d be a great flippin’ peace Ambassador after putting out all the ‘fires’ she … Continue reading Be Safe, Not Sorry
It's not just humans who are obsessed with sprinkles. Evidently Fat Farting Beagles are easily seduced by them too. I've just yelled at the Poopmeister because, as you can see, he was caught in the act. Snacking in the litter box. Dirty little shiteater - pffft! He has the audacity to look affronted at the … Continue reading Milo and the Kitty Nuggets
I’m so angry. I’ve just heard about the attempted and thankfully failed suicide of a teenager. Apparently they were being bullied online and couldn’t take it anymore. I am thoroughly convinced the Internet is the worst thing that has happened to our children. Cyber bullying, cyber predators, cyber sex, peer pressure, image distortion, to much … Continue reading Social Media. The End of Civilization?
I’ve been banjaxed for a couple of days so I’m playing almighty catchup here with days 27 through 30. Ironically I’m finishing the challenge the same way I started it, en block! Day 27 ‘A song that breaks your heart’ I think we can’t get past puberty without having a song that breaks our hearts. … Continue reading Days 27 – 30 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Today’s prompt was ‘A song that makes you want to fall in love’ This felt like it was going to be hard but then I rethought, it’s not a song about falling in love but a song that makes you want the kind of relationship described. Three songs immediately came to mind and I’ve been … Continue reading Day 26 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Golly what a long day! I’ve barely left the kitchen and I’m absolutely knackered. All cooking and cleaning is done. I’m stuffed full up to bustin’ and I’m FINALLY sitting down with NCIS, Coke Zero and sore feet! Today’s prompt is a song you like by a artist who’s no longer living. This is still … Continue reading Day 25 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Merry Christmas everyone. I had lofty intentions of commenting on everyone's blog but time hasn't been my friend. Have a wonderful time, laugh, smile, make memories. Christmas isn't about things, it's about love. That can't be bought or sold but it can be exchanged so I hope you all give and receive so much love … Continue reading Merry Christmas!
I’m slinging this in while my cheesecake is baking. Today has been ...fractious! Don’t you just love holidays?! I’ve made sausage and egg muffins for breakfast, peasant bread, shopped and made home made burgers with potato wedges for dinner. I’ve got caramel brownies in one oven and cheesecake in the other. It’s flippin’ tropical in … Continue reading Day 24 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Dear Walmart, You assholes. Can we get Christmas and New Year over before we start on flippin' St Valentine's Day? God forbid you miss a sale you fat, lard-arsed, money-grabbing wankers Love Britchy
Happy Christmas Eve! It’s mental here, I’m trying to catch up from losing a day yesterday. Lots to do. Anyway!! Today’s prompt ‘A song everyone should listen to’ I love this song. It’s resonated with me all my life and I find it inspirational and motivational as well as just enjoying listening. I usually go … Continue reading Day 23 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
I totally lost Saturday thanks to migraine. I hate it when that happens so here I am, playing catch-up at 1:20 in the morning. The 22nd prompt is ‘A song that moves you forward’ I used to listen to this over and over again when times were tough and it’s become my mantra. Knock me … Continue reading Day 22 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Today’s prompt is ‘A song with someone’s name in the title’ Good grief where to start? There are soooo many songs to choose from. Flicking through my iPod I found Billie Jean, Gloria, Roxanne, Cecilia, Cracklin’ Rosie, Sweet Caroline, Dear Prudence, Jolene.. there were tons. I stopped when I got to this one though because … Continue reading Day 21 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
It’s been another busy day. I have two of my three kids and my grandson here so I don’t seem to stop shopping,cooking, doing laundry and dishes.. why did I ever miss my empty nest?! I know I could ask for help and it’s no ones fault but mine that I don’t - but I … Continue reading Day 20 on the Magical Musical Advent Calendar.
The prompt for today is ’A song that makes you think about life’ It’s been a busy day. I didn’t go to bed until 3am and was up again at 6am. I’ve been into Rochester to take Alma the cat to her new mummy, I’ve had my phone fixed and the days just gone. I’m … Continue reading Day 19 on The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
It’s a trip in the way back machine today with ‘A song from the year you were born’ I had to look up what was in the charts the year I was born. Jeez! There was some proper crap! I looked through the list and found this song - another I’d forgotten all about but … Continue reading Day 18 on the Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Today’s prompt is ‘A song you’d sing a duet to at karaoke’ Oh boy. This would be the no song because I hate karaoke. The times I’ve had to endure the torture of hearing drunks warble their way timelessly mumbling half the words to songs are etched in my nightmares. I think I’d pick My … Continue reading Day 17 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Some thoughts to ponder today.. Public Service Announcement: Having lost my mind I ordered a peppermint mocha coffee this morning. It was *%¥@# AWFUL. You can save money by squeezing 6” of toothpaste and 8 tablespoons of sugar into your coffee to recreate the shite at home I had one mouthful and then shared it … Continue reading Monday, Monday..
Today’s prompt on the 30 day song challenge is ‘A song that’s a classic favorite’ My first thought was straight to classical music which I love. Oh Fortuna - but everyone thinks of the Omen or the X Factor Ride of the Valkyries, Night On Bald Mountain, Peer Gynt, The 1812 Overture, The William Tell … Continue reading Day 16 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
I was tagged by Sadje to follow the story. My part is the last. Rules– 1. Copy the story as it appears when you receive it (and the rules please) 2. Add somehow to the story in which ever style and length you choose 3. Be sure to pingback or comment on the original post … Continue reading The Snow Angel (FTS dec 4)
Today’s prompt on the 30 day song challenge is ‘A song you like that’s a cover by another artist’ There are a lot of covers I love, Disturbed and Sound Of Silence, UB40 and Red Red Wine, Fine Young Cannibals and Suspicious Minds.. I was getting bogged down so I went with the first thought … Continue reading Day 15 on the Magical Musical Advent Calendar
It's funny, I was just reminiscing. When I first heard about "Toy Story" the movie and the characters, "Buzz" and "Woody".. I have to be honest and say I was expecting a totally different type of film.. It got me thinking though about things I’d really like for Christmas. They ranged from ice cube makers … Continue reading A Bitchin’ Letter To Santa
Today’s prompt is ‘A song you’d like to be played at your wedding’. Since I wouldn’t get married again if you paid me your average schmaltzy lovey-dicey crap is out the window. If I was dragged to a wedding kicking and screaming my music choices would reflect that so if you hear any of the … Continue reading Day 14 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Today’s prompt is ‘a song you like from the 70’s.’ Kinda ironic given yesterday’s post but I got this! Again, there are a ton of songs with this as a qualifier for me. The hard bit is choosing. When in doubt, hit shuffle and pick the first seventies song to come up. Shuffling did a … Continue reading Day 13 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar.
Some of you may remember I ended up in the ER a week after I came back from Ireland with a weeklong headache and double vision. I was sent to see an opthamologist after that who sent me to an ophthalmic neurologist. I saw her last week. They dilated my eyes again but with all … Continue reading So you see – or not
Today's prompt is a song from your pre teen years. The 70’s were my pre teen years and they were a fantastic decade for music. I had all of my mums influences to listen to and my own growing appreciation. It’s easy to see how I have such eclectic tastes from a decade where everything … Continue reading Day 12 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Today’s prompt is ‘a song you never get tired of.’ There are a ton of songs with this as a qualifier for me. I’m going with a cover of a classic song. Honestly, I don’t really like the original of this. It’s a bit wishy washy. This version is incredible. I can and have listened … Continue reading Day 11 on The Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Is that a fantastic idea or what?! How it took me this long in life to justify myself I’ll never know but ho ho ho - I’ll just have to make up for lost time! ‘im indoors isn’t a morning person. He’s like the living dead and can barely grunt. He staggers out of bed, … Continue reading The Advent Calendar Of Naughtiness
Today’s prompt is for a song that makes you sad. There’s a lot of songs this applies as well sadly. We all have songs that bring back painful memories. I’m definitely only picking one of these because I don’t want to spend my day in a black hole. My mums death was very painful. We … Continue reading Day 10 on the Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Dear shop assistants ‘im indoors says I need a %*!#ing warning label. I think KNOW I’m in disgrace and it’s all your fault.. Y’all ask dumbass questions sometimes! Do I want my potatoes in a bag? “Are these white carrots? I can’t find white carrots” (on the scanner jobbywhatsit. They were Parsnips) “Would you like … Continue reading (Mis)Adventures In Christmas Tree Shopping
Today’s prompt is for a song that makes you happy. There’s a lot of songs this applies too! I’m behaving myself and only picking one. I knew it was going to be tough so I put my iPod on shuffle and picked the 9th song. Here it is. Goodbye Earl - The Dixie Chicks
Why is a Christmas tree better than a man? Well I'll tell you! •It stays up for 12 days and nights •It has cute balls •It looks good with the lights on •It's perfectly acceptable to have a new one every year •It's normal to throw it out when you're fed up of picking up … Continue reading A Buyers Guide to Christmas Trees And Men
Nova at My Namasté has tagged me in a game of questions with friends! If you want to join in feel free to copy and paste the questions and answer them yourself! My answers are in bold type. Finish The Thought 1 Those words I couldn’t say… I don’t want any more cake thank you. … Continue reading Twenty Questions
...aka White Elephants! Hurray!! Visualize my happy dance peeps because I’m thrilled to have been tagged again by Teresa, The Haunted Wordsmith in her White Elephant Christmas Tag! If you are unfamiliar with what a white elephant party is, it can be summed as as a party where people exchange gifts that are meant to … Continue reading Albino Pachyderms
I’m really enjoying this, it’s not to late to play catch up if you want to! It’s a lot of fun seeing what you all are picking. Today’s prompt is A song about drugs or alcohol. Well here’s to you, my lovely friends in low places! This song always reminds me of St Patrick’s Day … Continue reading Day 8 on the Magical Musical Advent Calendar
This may just be one of the most perfect stories I’ve ever read. If I can ask one thing of you, it’s please read this. It’s a life changer in the best way
At the grocery store this week, a woman dropped a box of blueberries. They went everywhere. She was too old to pick them up, and people up and down the aisles just stopped and stared. I just stopped and stared. Her trembling voice, shouting “Cleanup—I need a cleanup!” Embarrassed. Close to tears. Fucking blueberries. All of us staring at blueberries. A two minute pick up job. Less if others help. But we don’t. We just stare, and argue with ourselves.
After a good minute or two of arguing, I deduce that I’m a complete and utter asshole, and put down my basket. Pick up the blueberries. Feel like an absolute idiot as my left palm fills and I have no space for all the rest.
Now it’s my trembling voice, weakly shouting “Anyone have a bag?”
People stare. They keep staring. The line six carts deep. Everyone watching. No one…
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Yes, my third post of the day! If I’d thought about it like a sensible person I’d have saved the monstrous mosh mash of ‘Twas The Night Before Christmas’ until tomorrow - but heigh ho, it’s that lack of restraint issue again!! So today’s prompt is A song to drive to. I do a lot … Continue reading Day 7 on the Magical Musical Advent Calendar
Here, if needed, is proof of why I should NEVER be left to my own devices.. I've tried to add as many bloggers as possible. If I follow you and you're not here thank your lucky stars it's because I ran out of original sin!! ‘Twas The Blog before Christmas And throughout WordPress Not a … Continue reading ‘‘Twas The Blog Before Christmas…”
"Yesterday, December 7, 1941 — a date which will live in infamy — the United States of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of Japan." This Franklin D Roosevelt addressed the Nation. Today is the 77th Anniversary of the attack on America by Japan. The event that … Continue reading A Day That Will Live Forever In Infamy.
Today’s prompt is A song that makes you want to dance. Yeah you knew it was going to happen. Sooner or later, rule breaking was going to commence. It shouldn’t be ANY surprise that I chose sooner! Titselina Bumsqueak, Fat Sharon and myself used to go dancing at least three or four nights a week. … Continue reading The Magical Musical Advent Calendar – Day 6
I so wanted to call it the ‘marvellous mouse organ’ Shades Of Bagpuss. Oh how I loved Bagpuss, back in the days when I was even sweeter and politer than I am now... *Exits stage right to avoid thunderbilts* Today’s song prompt is A song that needs to be played loud Honestly, every song I … Continue reading Day 5 On The Magical Musical Advent Calendar!!
My Fandabbydozy pal, Kristian is taking part in a really fun challenge. As soon as I saw it I couldn’t resist joining in. It’s kind of like a Christmas Musical Advent Calendar but instead of a picture you follow the grid to pick a song per day. I’m starting today by playing catch up but … Continue reading A Musical Advent Calendar!! (30 Day Song Challenge)
Nope not Bob Marley but almost as good - Our beloved Rory asked for a trifecta of answers to the following subjects. Here are my offerings! Name Three … Potato Dishes? Tartiflette, Potato Candy and Potato Bread Types of Flowers? Bluebells, Poppies and Snowdrops American Authors? Harper Lee, Deborah Harkness and Margaret Mitchell Rivers in … Continue reading Three Little Things
As you all probably know by now I kinda like questionnaires! Teresa at The Haunted Wordsmith posted a list of questions and well - it’s my catnip! 1. What is the worst topping someone could put on a pizza? I’m not really a pizza fan to be honest. I belong to the ‘I like pineapple … Continue reading Twenty Questions
So, being the jammy git that I am, I was lucky enough to be tagged by not one but TWO fantabulous bloggers for a new game created by Teresa, The Haunted Wordsmith It’s a White Elephant Gift tag and both Rory, The Guy Called Bloke and Kristian Of Tales From The Mind Of Kristian tagged … Continue reading All you want for Christmas?! Maybe not!!
Teresa, The Haunted Wordsmith has asked A few nighttime questions... so I answered them... 1 What is your favorite nighttime snack? I think it would be Hot Chocolate, Ovaltine or Horlicks. I love hot milky drinks when I want to get sleepy. 2 Porky Pig or Miss Piggy? Oooh no contest! I love MissPiggy. She’s … Continue reading Blogging for Insomniacs!
Finally, after a month of avoiding me and lurking in broom cupboards, Goldie at The Daily Flabbergast has realized resistance is futile and has returned to our happy little WordPress community. I’ve missed our Goldie so this makes me very happy, I don’t like it when my favorite bloggers go awol. I think I have … Continue reading Reward or Retribution?!
Lana from Welcome To Our Campfire asked about Christmas trees and my answer would have been too long for her poor comments box! We have a fake tree because I have a weird allergy to real ones. My hands and face swell up if I touch them and it’s painful. The bizarre thing is that … Continue reading Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree – Why Do You Cause Such Misery?!
A listers. Who the actual eff groups people like this? Oh you’re not good enough for this group so you go in second best, third best and so on. No wonder these people are so shallow. Entertainment is a fickle, immoral industry. Whatever I do or don’t wish for my kids, Hollywood ain’t on MY … Continue reading A-Z Of Things I Am NOT Thankful For..
I had to go to Best Buy today as I wanted an original Samsung charger for my tablet. I went in wearing my "vegetarian vampire" shirt and this mall cop stood right in front of me stuck his thumbs in his belt all cocky and said " So what does a vegetarian vampire do then?" … Continue reading Deep Holes And Shallow Thoughts
There’s a lot of crap on social media. A lot of ‘if you don’t do x then y will die/Bill Gates will donate a dollar/ share this or you don’t care about cancer etc. it really pisses me off that people are so gullible or so in need of approval they repost and share this … Continue reading I’m Glad I Tell Ya! Glad Up To Here!
This year I shall be carrying on a tradition I started two years ago. Maybe it’s a little early to call it a tradition - but it’s something I intend doing always. The year before last at about this time I was buying chocolate advent calendars for the kids. It’s something they love and I … Continue reading How To Make Your Christmas Merry And Bright
Kristian at Tales From The Mind Of Kristian, one of my favorite bloggers, has nominated me for a challenge created by Teresa at The Haunted Wordsmith. If you like very entertaining stories then these are two blogs you should be following. Directions (how about we call them directions rather than rules): 1. Answer the questions … Continue reading The ‘Ask It’ Round
My life has just reached a new low - I was chatted up in Walmart *sigh* "Hunka-hunka-burninlurve" INSISTED he knew me, he said he must have gone to school with me (Errrr NO!) Was I friends with X,Y or Z? NOPE!! Persistent little shitpot - then he said “Maybe I come in to where you … Continue reading Walmart Dating. Or Not..
Last week Bottomless Coffee ran a question and answer session which was a lot of fun. He challenged those of us who asked questions to allow our readers the same opportunity - so I did! Here are the questions I was asked and my answers to them. If you asked me questions or even if … Continue reading Reader Request Friday’s
It's only one more day until tomorrow so I thought I'd share some jokes that I find very funny - if you are 'infantile' like me, enjoy! I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day. I told my girlfriend she drew … Continue reading Here I Am!! Ready To Brighten Your Day!!
You can ask any questions here in the comments section between now and Thursday and I’ll answer them on Friday – here goes nothing!!
I was tagged by Mel at Crushed Caramel to participate in a very novel challenge created by Rory, that Guy Called Bloke! It’s answering questions... with a twist! You have to draw on your powers of deduction and answer them in the manner of another blogger... First you have to cherchez la victim.. is there … Continue reading Who can I be today?!
A friend and I were out shopping this morning and got into a lift (elevator) with a guy with horrific dandruff. When he got out she turned to me and said "Someone needs to give him some head and shoulders" I've been thinking all morning and I just can't work it out.. how in HELL … Continue reading Monday Funday or Shopping Is Murder..
In keeping with Rakkelle and Bottomless Coffee I’ve decided to stick with the ‘Ask me anything’ theme. Let’s see where it goes! You can ask any questions here in the comments section between now and Thursday and I’ll answer them on Friday - here goes nothing!!
To anyone who has fought for my freedom, I thank you. Your sacrifices have given me the freedom to be me and I don't - and will never forget that. Some have given time, others have lost limbs. Too many have lost lives. All are changed and I can't begin to convey the respect I … Continue reading In Honour Of Those Who Sit And Wait.
I read this post from a blog I thoroughly enjoy, Mitch Teemley. I hope you enjoy a fun Saturday chuckle!
Facebook just got me in trouble. I hope you’re happy now Mark bloody Zuckerberg. Next time your going to steal an idea from the Winkytosser twins think of the innocent victims.. like me. One of my friends posted this: Naturally it made me think and I thought ‘I wonder if I can still whistle’ ... … Continue reading Whistle While You Work..
My fellow blogger, Bottomless Coffee gave everyone the option last week to ask him anything. He’s going to make it a weekly thing where people get a chance to pick the topic and then ask questions on the topic. The first topic chosen was himself so we all asked him questions about him, his thoughts, … Continue reading Reader Request Friday’s!
I'm only going to make one post election comment. On Tuesday I sat at the polls all day as an election inspector. At about 9am the local Democrat and Republican parties collaborated and brought coffee and donuts to all the polling stations in our town. They worked together and did something good. It was a … Continue reading Moving Forward… Together?
Both Laura at All The Shoes I Wear and Jenni at Housewife Hustle have nominated me for a 'go back and kick your fifteen year old arse' tag. I'm not sure I can do that, I wore MUCH higher heels then, I don't think decrepit me can kick that high!! If I could build a … Continue reading A Trip In The Waaay Back Machine? No Thanks!
I was nominated twice for a Sunshine Blogger Award by both Jenni at Housewife Hustle and Kristian at Tales From The Mind Of Kristian Here are their Questions! Here are Kristian’s Questions first 1 Do you like Halloween? Yes I love it! We always had Halloween parties as kids so it’s always been fun for … Continue reading Sunshine Bloggeration
Halloween is over for another year. You can always tell because BOOM! Christmas shit is everywhere. I’m already sick to the eyeballs of ‘snowy white snow and jingle bells’ Seriously, who writes this crap? That’s a whole ‘nuther post. This may go on record as my most boring well behaved Halloween ever. It was just … Continue reading Trick or… Bitch?
... but falling apart is dead easy!! It's been a funny couple of weeks. I had a headache the day after I flew home from Ireland which I put down to jet lag after a long flight and then an equally long drive home. Literally!! Six and a half hours on the plane, seven hours … Continue reading Breaking Up Is Hard To Do…
Something to think about - make today YOURS!! Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown? Statistic of the day: More Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died of Ebola. The statistic does not state which is considered a worse fate. If you came with Instructions, what would they … Continue reading A Little Something For The Weekend?
You gotta know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em.. That Kenny Rogers song is rattling around in my noggin and won’t go away. Sometimes you can’t help people no matter how hard you try. Knowing when to step back... and doing it - well they’re two of the hardest things ever to … Continue reading Every Hands A Winner And Every Hands A Loser
Gordon Ramsey. I'm not sure whether he's more famous for his cooking or his swearing. A little of both the guess! It's worked very well for him, Roast 'taters and The Eff Word.. so I thought I'd cash in. I'm more heifer than 'effer' so I decided I'd better bloody well think of something else. … Continue reading Chicken Bloody Pot Pie
I might have been a little bit naughty. Or Educational, take your pick. One of my friends who shall remain nameless (male and thicker than poo!!) was posting that his internet was really slow. Being "helpful" I told him his posts weren't showing up and that he must be was having connectivity issues and to … Continue reading Earth Men Are Easy
It’s 40F this morning. I think I have hypothermia, or hypochondria.. hypo-IHateWinter anyhow. We went out for a drive yesterday to see the fall colour - FAIL! What’s happened this year?! It’s seriously the worst fall I’ve ever seen! We stopped at an apple and pumpkin stand and bought some apples. Crispin’s as big as … Continue reading A Roundabout Route to Apple Pie
He's at it again! Rory at A Guy Called Bloke has created a Halloween challenge- music to murder by?! What would you choose?! I'm not tagging anyone in particular because I think there's a lot of you that would like this and I don't want any of my tribe to feel excluded! I'd really love … Continue reading Music To Take A Buggers Breath away – Literally!!
I stole this from Melanie at Sparks From A Combustible Mind and it looked like fun! Feel free to join in! 1. Do you like blue cheese? Yes I love it. I have found I prefer 'whiter' blue cheese like Danish to 'yellowy' blue cheese like Stilton though. I adore Stilton soup and white Stilton with … Continue reading Blogging On The Bathroom Wall
It sFnowed and turned to ice this morning and yesterday morning. It was below freezing both mornings too. I’m not a happy Britchy! Winter is upon us and it’s time to start planning my hibernation. I do not willingly leave warmth and anyone talking about the traumatic horrors of snow and ice can Get Stuffed! … Continue reading The ‘S’ Word And The Telly
I was re-reading Anne of Green Gables earlier and had to smile at her "White Way Of Delight" description of blossom trees lining a road as they drove along in a pony and trap. I spent a few happy minutes thinking how nice to describe places like that. Then I went out to the kitchen … Continue reading Thinkery I have Thunkeried
Monday was spent in the ER. A bit of a saga but I came home with a headache after the flight from Ireland on Tuesday last week. The first couple of days I was calling it Over Tiredness and Jet Lag. There’s no one who can make an excuse not to see a doctor better … Continue reading My Week So Far..
Have you ever noticed how news sites and other media malarkey is full of *big* people? People the world considers "important"? Have you ever met anyone famous? Were you in awe? Why? What have they done for you? I'm grateful everyday for the "little" people in my life. People who aren't rich. Aren't famous. Aren't … Continue reading The Most Important People In The World.
The Haunted Wordsmith has a story tag which she starts and then passes the baton. You can continue it to where you want! There are no set number of days/ blogs it must run so anyone can choose to finish it or extend it. This is her start to the story and the following progress … Continue reading (Finish The Story Oct #3) ‘Number 604’
This weeks challenge from Esther Chilton is Favourite Indulgence. Click the embedded link if you'd like to join in the fun! I have a natural ability To disrupt and destroy the tranquility I’m a bit of a prankster So if you’re a wanker Behaving’s an improbability.... So when asked for my favourite indulgence My thoughts … Continue reading My Favourite Indulgence
Sometimes I amaze even myself. Jobs I thought were commonplace are obviously rocket science and I never knew.. For example. The toilet roll needed changing. Someone got a new roll out of the cupboard and left it on the windowsill beside the toilet roll holder but didn't take the old empty roll off the spindle. … Continue reading My Super Hero Resume
So the day has come already. I’ll be leaving Ireland to fly home to NY. I’ve missed home all the time I’ve been here and I’ll miss here the minute I go. It’s always a worry leaving an older parent because.. you know. It's been a lovely two weeks, both here and in Tenerife and … Continue reading Headin’ home..
"I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all." Happy Very Special Birthday to me! Three years ago today I recited the pledge and became a US Citizen. Something I have been amazed … Continue reading Becoming A US Citizen
Nepali-Australians Annual Blog Awards 2018 I found this on Laura’s blog and naturally, I can’t wait to nominate the blogs I love so much too! It’s very hard thing to choose.. Pretty impossible in fact - but I wanted to both participate AND go a little further. I’ve lost a lot of people in the … Continue reading Annual Blog Awards 2018
Esther’s weekly challenge is to write something on the subject of favourite songs, music or artists so without further ado, my playlist.. I know I once said that I’m yours... and I was - for the longest time but guess what Mr. Know-It-All? SO WHAT?! You’ve been talking in your sleep about your new Dark … Continue reading Dear Ex…
I’ve realized a lot of things on this trip to see my Dad, not all of them great! He’s turned into a Mister Magoo with Tourette’s while driving for instance. How I’m still alive, well - I just don’t know! I now know this: I remember more prayers than I ever thought I knew They … Continue reading Driving With My Dad
Sadly we'll be heading back to Dublin and then Galway tomorrow. I've had a fabulous time and will be sad to leave. I'll definitely be back. I think I've consumed my own weight twice over this week! I'm looking forward to getting home to NY and telling you all about it.
Following on from last week, Esther has challenged everyone to write a poem, limerick, story etc about books. I read that while up a Volcano .. and this came about as we were coming down from Mount Teide on the tour bus! I’m now back at the hotel with honey rum and those hairpin bends … Continue reading She’ll Be Coming Round The Mountain Writing Poems…
Here we are in Tenerife and as I write this, it's hot and sunny with nary a cloud in the sky... HOWEVER, considering that I've left hurricanes and Tornados in my wake you can expect change at any time! I shall write a lot more from both Ireland and NY when I get home but … Continue reading Just a quickie!
I'm here safe and sound in Galway having just shovelled as much tea and soda bread down my neck as humanly possible! We're heading across country to Dublin shortly and then flying to Tenerife tomorrow. So far it's been Saturday in New York, Sunday in Galway, Monday in Dublin and Tuesday in Tenerife. I don't … Continue reading If it’s Monday it must be Dublin..
First leg of my journey starts when I finish my Coke Zero! I'm driving about 5ish hours to Poughkeepsie ready for my flight to Ireland tomorrow night! 'im indoors wanted me to rest before the flight because he says I'm doing too much with my knackered shoulder and everything else. I Wear the poxy sling … Continue reading ..And she’s off!!
This poetry malarkey is too much! Jeez. My brain hurts! I blame cake because I made a couple of dozen cupcakes today. I’m feeling a bit sick now because I’ve eaten four. My son Fartichoke exclaimed ‘Mum that’s your THIRD!’ I was very indignant I can tell you and righteously corrected him ‘It’s my second. … Continue reading A Pirate Life For Me..