This whole ‘Having A Job Malarkey’ is really getting in the way of me living my best life. I need cheering up. That means you have to suffer along while I amuse myself!
A woman walks into a library and asked if they had any books about paranoia. The librarian says “They’re right behind you!”
When a deaf person sees someone yawn do they think it’s a scream?
Pro tip: If you find yourself using the phrase ‘no drama’ a lot, you’re probably the one bringing it.