November, Month Of The Damned..

Snow in November is caused by people decorating for Christmas too early. This is known as Premature Precipitation. You’ll know if you’ve been Prematurely Precipitated if you are suddenly covered in white stuff.

With Premature Precipitation you can never know how long it will last or how many inches you’ll get. There is a very good chance you’ll end up in a wet spot.

Play safe. Leave the wood in the forest and don’t polish your baubles until December.

Premature Precipitation has frequently been confused with another November issue: Electile Dysfunction.

Unlike Premature Precipitation, Electile Dysfunction results in a Snow Job that can last 2, 4 or 6 years. It’s Snow Joke people.

Electile Dysfunction can cause higher taxes, excessive law making, loss of lifelong friendships, representative deafness and Tourette’s. Regardless of who causes Electile Dysfunction we will all be affected. Electile Dysfunction is the most rampant STD of our times, no matter who we vote for, somehow, we are ALL getting f’ed.

70 thoughts on “November, Month Of The Damned..

    1. Ugh!! I was talking to my daughter on the phone yesterday when I looked out the kitchen window and saw it. I let forth an expletive loaded torrent of vitriol causing my son to remark later “I thought you were talking to Sprint”
      Thus endeth my ‘recommendations’ for cellular providers!

      Liked by 2 people

  1. Our premature precipitation came in October this year. obviously it was caused by the Halloween decorations being purchased in September. Elective dysfunction happens every single day. Argh!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I thought October was month of the dead with Halloween and all oh wait damned not dead haha but I dream of chilling in the ice cause it’s freaking hot as hell this side of the equator, sun trying to turn me into a hot mess, or practising for hell lol

    Merry Christmas
    ~B

    Liked by 1 person

  3. How about Premature Participation Precipitation. Christmas trees showed up in Costco in Durham last month. What? Thanksgiving not good enough, anymore?

    If you are headed this way, no snow but, funky temps. I jumps up & down from low 70s to middle 30s. We haven’t had a hard freeze…yet. At least we are getting some rain. We were on water restrictions during the summer.

    You too busy for an email? I didn’t want to bug you too much. I know you are up to your eyeballs.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh, snowmageddon how much I miss you … NOT!
    SE (coastal Georgia) hardly gets snow, but when it does … look out!
    Personally, I feel that the electile dysfunction plays more havoc on people’s lives than the weather. People used to be nomadic and would just move away from the “offending” weather – we can’t get away from poli-tics

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Well, I’m officially glad I live in a place where there’s NO SNOW EVER! And where Christmas is in SUMMER! It’s definitely easier – LOL. I also live in a place with compulsory voting, and while I certainly believe in voting and would vote every time even if it were voluntary (the results of electile dysfunction are NOT fun), not having a choice about it can sometimes suck. Have fun surviving it all! 🙂 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I have come to this realization myself Britchy. It’s a fucked up situation and no matter the choice, bad things will happen to all.

    All the 2A Trump supporters out there couldn’t care less about Trump gun control, all they care about is crushing the other side.

    All the progressives out there are simply looking to crush the traditionalists, regardless of the cost on freedom for all.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s no longer what can we do to improve, it’s what we can do to obstruct.
      The money WASTED on all of this is criminal. Pelosi has just diverted $2.4 billion from social security to pay for the impeachment. Whether or not anyone feels that should go ahead isn’t the point, no matter where you stand, that’s not where the money should come from to pay for it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I agree. The problem is both sides feel as if they have been getting pushed around for decades and it’s the other side’s fault.

        When in reality, it’s the constant worship of those we elect. Therefore, we are so personally invested in these scam artists, that we feel as if it is incumbent upon us to constantly prop them up.

        So, we invest our time and money into their personal campaigns, all the while, they don’t even know our names…nor could they care.

        The United States used to be just that…a nation built from many smaller nations that retained their sovereignty. But now, the U.S., like KFC, are merely letters that signify an entire swath of land that must all adhere to the nonsense of one person or one party. No longer do people seek out independence and freedom and work towards their own independence…since we have to be on guard constantly to keep the other side from becoming too powerful.

        Sadly, I think this is the natural course and there is no going back now. The only fix, will be to allow this to happen, since most must experience true pain to understand the ramifications of their neo colonialism ideology.

        2020 is going to be a bloodbath and may be the catalyst for a physical civil war, then again, maybe I’m mistaken.

        If more would simply attempt to improve their own situation, then perhaps less would look to politicians for jobs, education, healthcare and money overall. The more problems we take to capital hill, the worse off we all are.

        Almost 3 years of trump and abortion is still legal and still funded.

        Almost 3 years of trump and no actual wall yet to speak of.

        Almost 3 years of trump and more gun control than ever.

        Almost 3 years of trump and the wars are still taking place.

        Almost 3 years of trump and what has if anything changed? More jobs, is that what our president is expected to do….get us a job because we are so incredibly stupid, we cannot be expected to handle and deal with our own situations?

        I wonder if that $2.4 billion was borrowed or if it was cash?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Who will ever know? They’re all scammers. The problem with politics is anyone who would be good is too smart to run – and the only people who run are the last people we should allow. We literally need a do over. Sack the lot and go back to the constitution and above all else, term limits for everyone in any public office.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I totally want to agree with that but that would only allow those who can afford to run to decide the fate of the country or even the town hall. We do need to pay elected officials but a living wage and with regular healthcare and a 401k not all the other clap trap they get now. I’d like to see public display of all their bank accounts from the moment of running for office and all accounting for expenses etc.
        I’d also like to see lobbying outlawed and jail time for anyone taking cash or other favors from them.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. The funny thing is…is that the overwhelming majority of elected representatives we have now, were rich enough before they ran…and now we pay them…for a job that they rarely if ever do…and some are paid…while they travel around and politic for a higher office.

        So it makes me wonder, if they aren’t doing the job they were hired for in the first place, and we continue to pay them, what makes us think that if they are elected to a higher office, that they will even carry out the duties in their new billet? Or will they continue to look to the sky, to plan their next move, towards the throne. All the while, getting paid to plan their next move.

        Makes me wonder, what are we getting in return for our investment?

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Sweet FA. That’s what!
        Look at NY. Cuomo. The mans a complete dirtbag. 47 counties in NY voted against him, 15 for him, all the NYC seats for the most part so that’s where he concentrates. He does little if anything for other parts of the state except divert funds. We can’t get rid of him unless NYC turns on him. That’s the problem right there. This state is set up to screw the taxpayer, it’s going to be interesting to see what happens as more and more tax payers leave the state

        Liked by 1 person

  7. This is so funny and such a heartbreak that it’s true. I am not looking forward to the amount of chaos and hate this election season will break…I miss the good old days of voting. Can’t believe there is snow out there too. Looks pretty but now that I know how it feels and how annoying frozen pipes are I will pass on the snow. Love to visit it though.

    Liked by 1 person

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