..because the thoughts that fall, kicking and screaming from my head need a safe place to land..
I have got a mahooosive fridge freezer. It's wider than I'm long. It's 66"" wide, I'm 61" tall. I love it but the boys? Not so much! The problem is the doors weren't hung quite right when it was fitted. The fridge side is off slightly which causes it to reopen if you don't shut … Continue reading Fartichoke And The Revenge Of The Fridge
Don’t be afraid to leave a job. There comes a time when they can’t see past what they think you are or can do. Sometimes you have to shine your light in a different corner Don’t be afraid to dance. It doesn’t matter who is watching, it only matters that you feel alive. Don’t be … Continue reading Don’t
Well in spite of being extraordinarily busy at work and working extra hours every day this week.. I still found time to ponder a load of crap. Obviously this means YOU now have to ponder it too! These are the things I think of when I’m hiding out in the bathroom because I’m over peopled!! … Continue reading Things I Just Don’t Get..
So this was an educational weekend. We got a lot of gardening done but the kitchen progress stalled because Home Depot cut the kitchen counter tops incorrectly. I did suggest ‘im indoors measured them before accepting them but What Do I Know. I Am A Mere Woman And Shouldn’t Trouble My Pretty Little Head With … Continue reading What A Palaver!
We all try our best at parenting. Some times we get it right. Sometimes we don’t. Sometimes we feel like we got it right but later, way down the line we’ll, we realise.. maybe not. This is one such incident. I have a funny story from when my daughter was little. She was 5 or … Continue reading … That Time I Failed As A Parent..
Swearing or NOT Swearing - A Load Of Old Shit? I over heard a child swearing in Wegmans today. I really should thank Wegmans sometime. There's a large portion of my posts that exist solely because of interactions therein! Anyway. The little boy must've been about two. He was sitting in the cart while his … Continue reading Well, Son of A Beech…
....you know it's going to be one of those days when your daughter texts you a picture of a fella and you text back: How much did you drink? 1. He's too old for you 2. He's repulsive. 3. Check the sex offender registry because that right there is a pervert. ....and she replies "That's … Continue reading The Frog Prince?
I’m so angry. I’ve just heard about the attempted and thankfully failed suicide of a teenager. Apparently they were being bullied online and couldn’t take it anymore. I am thoroughly convinced the Internet is the worst thing that has happened to our children. Cyber bullying, cyber predators, cyber sex, peer pressure, image distortion, to much … Continue reading Social Media. The End of Civilization?
Something to think about - make today YOURS!! Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown? Statistic of the day: More Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died of Ebola. The statistic does not state which is considered a worse fate. If you came with Instructions, what would they … Continue reading A Little Something For The Weekend?
I was re-reading Anne of Green Gables earlier and had to smile at her "White Way Of Delight" description of blossom trees lining a road as they drove along in a pony and trap. I spent a few happy minutes thinking how nice to describe places like that. Then I went out to the kitchen … Continue reading Thinkery I have Thunkeried
Sometimes I amaze even myself. Jobs I thought were commonplace are obviously rocket science and I never knew.. For example. The toilet roll needed changing. Someone got a new roll out of the cupboard and left it on the windowsill beside the toilet roll holder but didn't take the old empty roll off the spindle. … Continue reading My Super Hero Resume
Here we are in Tenerife and as I write this, it's hot and sunny with nary a cloud in the sky... HOWEVER, considering that I've left hurricanes and Tornados in my wake you can expect change at any time! I shall write a lot more from both Ireland and NY when I get home but … Continue reading Just a quickie!
I was thinking about hurricane advice and I realised, obviously it's all subjective. Stocking up on Bread and milk is NOT a good idea if you're gluten or lactose intolerant for instance.. so from there it was an easy stretch for me into how I'd 'survive' a hurricane!! Stores running out of gas,water and canned … Continue reading How I Would Get Through Hurricanes…
Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin! August 13 2018 August 13 is the 225th day of the year (226th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. There are 140 days remaining until the end of the year. The zodiac sign for August 13 is Leo. Astrological symbol: Lion. This zodiac symbol is considered to … Continue reading August 13, 2018
I was watching TV last night and got bored so I was flicking through for something to watch. I’ve FINALLY watched every episode of NCIS and Criminal Minds so I was at a bit of a loss. I came across a movie, The Spiderwick Chronicles. I’d taken the kids to see this at the Cinema … Continue reading How To Kill A Goblin Or Piss Off Your Ex
A good Christian would forgive you - A good Texan would just shoot you but me, I’m going to make you wish you’d never been born Going to the loo is euphemistically called ‘spending a penny’ Spend a penny my arse!! It was 20 cents the last time I was in Galway! - The inflation … Continue reading Tuesday Thoughts
Who remembers way back in the olden days - those prehistoric times when we had dial up modems - 28.8 was scorchingly fast. Windows 95 was the hot ticket, Netscape and ICQ - It was the Bronze Age Of Internet-ery and no one wanted to admit to being online as the internet was only for … Continue reading Fisher Price and Mattel – or How I Learned The Importance Of Phrasing In Google Searches..
We’re going on a trip in the way back machine today! Fasten your seatbelts and refrain from smoking whilst we prepare for Blast Off.. Sit back comfortably but don’t go to sleep because, well, things can happen in dreams and real life simultaneously. You didn’t know that? Get yourself some caffeine and I’ll explain. Farquhar … Continue reading The Ex Files Or How To REALLY Live Your Dreams..
You know the saying ‘The Devil makes work for idle hands’? Hold that thought. It’s the best alibi I’ve got. Weekday mornings when my kids were little were chaotic. I was still in England with my ex so I had two school kids, a baby, me, two kittens trying to climb up my legs and … Continue reading The Pros And Cons Of Laser Hair Removal – Or Feline Groovy..
I was down in NC (amongst other places) last week and I stayed with my son Fartichoke and his friends. For some obscure reason his friends love me and all have to visit every time I’m down which led to many sunrise bedtimes.. I’m getting too old for that crap! Fartichoke was telling stories of … Continue reading How I Upset EVERYONE!!
I haz a numb bum! A very numb bum, I nearly had two kittens too which would have made the numb bum worth it but I was pipped at the post. Murder Mittens (tabby and white kitten) and Scrapper Stinkbutt (coal black kitten) weren’t meant for me but there is a ginger hooligan waiting for … Continue reading Road Trips, Kittens and a Numb Bum!!
For many this is one of the most bittersweet holidays in the year. We've either lost a mother, we have kids in situations neither they or we wanted to be in or our kids are too far away or too busy to find time for us. Some of us have never been mothers, some of … Continue reading A Thought for Mothers Day
Kids have such a lovely way of both surprising and shaming us at the same time don’t they?! When mine were little, I was waiting at the school gates, as you do! My 6 year old daughter (at the time) arrived but I still had to wait for my son. At the top of her … Continue reading Kids Say The Darnedest Things!!
So I have this friend who we'll call ‘Mary Hinge’ (cos that's not her name) My girl has a bit of a disability. She's deaf. She must be. She didn't listen to my Anglo Saxon monologue warning and went and got herself married. Sentenced to life by a gold band and a big cake. Now … Continue reading Monkey Business
Having created a way to recognise blogs that entertain, me, move me and make me think I now have the incredibly hard part of choosing which to nominate. As a recap, this is not bound by any rules. It doesn’t require the recipient to do anything. Its just something from me to you that’s a … Continue reading My Recommended Blog of the Day 04/29/18.
Oh how delightful it is in North Carolina! I'm sat on a boat dock in 78f degrees with alligators swimming under me. I shit you not. There are five foot long alligators swimming much too close for my comfort. Maybe I should stop feeding them hush puppies but 1. I don't like hush puppies 2. … Continue reading Escape from New York
You know how it is when your kids? You think your Parents know everything. They see through every fib you tell, they know every scrap of naughtiness - heck they even know the nine times multiplication table!! The Oracle at Delphi had nothing on Parents and especially not my Dad. He saw through everything. He … Continue reading Tarzan and The Chandelier
I had a problem with money disappearing out of my purse a couple of years ago. Ten bucks here, Twenty there, it was very annoying. Apart from the obvious ‘someone was stealing’ part, I’d go to look for cash and there wouldn’t be any. If anyone had asked for the money I’d have given it … Continue reading To Catch a Rat..
So far since living in the US I haven’t had any truck with the Joeys*. Maybe it’s because we lived in the middle of a largely Amish community when I first moved here. There’s no explanation why we’re escaping their visits now though, unless either my reputation proceeds me or they aren’t as tenuous here … Continue reading Miss Manners (UN)Guide to Answering the Door
It was November of 2012 which you may remember, was a Presidential Election year here in the US. I hadn’t even had my green card for a year at this point but I still wanted to be a part of the Electoral Process so, I was planning to go with my husband when he went … Continue reading How Obama Broke My Bones
When Fartichoke was a little lad we’d go to visit his dads mum. She was one of those that liked blue toilet water. Yeah. THEM! She’d have those plastic thingies that hang over rims of toilets under the seat and turn the water blue when you flush. Personally, I thought the lads aiming at them … Continue reading Fartichoke, The Thunder Box and The Aliens From Uranus.
It really is a wonderful world. I'm sharing this today as a reminder to me that no culture is made up of purely bad people. There are good people everywhere, you just have to look. Years ago when the kids were very small I used to have foreign language students to stay while they were … Continue reading Roast Chicken – the Answer to World Peace.
So..... I'd gone on a day trip to France to shop when my kids were really little, Fartichoke was only about six weeks old so Brid was just over a year old. Yes, there isn't a year between them. It explains a lot about my sanity doesn't it?! Anyway it was the end of the … Continue reading Entente UN Cordiale…
Bitchin’ in the Kitchen 